I can see it

The picture on the right was taken on March 11, 2011 at my son's birthday party.  It was just days before my journey began.  The picture on the left was taken June 25, 2011 at a cousin's wedding.  I didn't want to take either picture.  In fact, they are the only pictures I posed for at either event.  I have been running from cameras for several years now, just couldn't stand to look at myself.  However, a strange thing happened when I received the wedding picture yesterday.  I smiled.  It didn't make me cringe or feel ashamed.  For the first time, I could "see" what everyone has been telling me.  Because although everyone says really nice things to me, I just couldn't see it.  My clothes fit better and some don't fit at all, and I know the scale in my bathroom is not lying to me, but I just really couldn't see it.  But as I looked at this picture I could "see" it - at least for a few minutes until my eyes filled with tears.  I know I'm still a long way from where I need to be, but the first step sure does feel good.  My doctor was super impressed, too.  Numbers are not perfect, but they are better, and now I have a new goal.  Another 3 months and another 30 pounds.  I'll keep you updated.